Hangin' in the Land Down Under: Australia Stopover

Somebody call 911, I am in culture shock full throttle. I have been back in the good ol' Great North for count 'em four weeks and I feel lost in a cloudy maze of confusion. I sit in my grey cubicle day in and day out (I started back at work a mere 3 days after returning. Not the best strategy for easing my way back into things) and the last 15 months (WOW) feel like a dream. A perfect reverie that couldn't have possibly happened. There is no way that this time last year I was riding my bike around Osaka, toasting life to the cheers of Canpi and struggling to find my way in a foreign land. It is impossible that just over a month ago I was watching Lakme at the Sydney Opera House and feeding Kangaroos. How can it be that a month and a half ago I was sitting on a beach in Thailand deciding whether or not I should go to meditation, have some curry or sign up for a snorkelling trip. It's going to be a long road back to feeling at home, back at home.

Australia Adventures

I spent the last two weeks of my trip in the land Down Under and I am in love. No, I haven't found the love of my life but I have fallen in love with Australia and its many charms (not the least of which is the adorable accent of the Aussie men). I found a cheapie flight from Bangkok to Melbourne via Singapore and got to hang out in the most fantastic airport in the free world. Jazz bands and tv lounges. Free movie theatres and a pool on the roof. I was thinking about changing my flight so I could hang out for a bit longer!


Arriving in Melbourne I was treated like a convict. Security Guard eyes darted around suspiciously eyeing me and my weary baggage. I was asked about the contents of my bag about 4 times, was sniffed by a drug dog twice and was persecuted for having a wooden Canadian magnet in my bag that I had neglected to mention on my customs form.

While this interrogation continued, I was busy spying on all of the Aussie men. Now this particular grouping wasn’t particularly handsome as far as handsome men go, but it was the first time I’d seen such a concentration of western men in the same place in almost 15 months and I was in a bit of shock. 

Australia ended up being my shock pad for almost everything as it was my first western experience in what felt like forever. The cost of everything was the biggest shocker. I went from paying 4 dollars to take a cab 30 minutes from Bangkok to the International Airport, and spent 60 dollars taking the 20 minute cab ride from Melbourne International to my friend’s house. The weather was also a shock. I am the only moron in the world who schedules a trip to Australia in the middle of winter. So here I am going from a daily outfit of tank top, skirt and flip flops to a hastily purchased Target wardrobe including winter jacket and possum fur gloves. Add to that the fact that I was experiencing language shock schizophrenia (when you suddenly hear English everywhere and can’t help but listen to everyone’s conversations at the same time, making your head spin right round like a record player baby). It was pretty insane...



Anyhow, I was lucky enough to know a number of people in Australia who were amazing enough to let me stay in their homes during my stay. They were all so wonderful in fact that I wanted to stuff 'em all in my suitcase and bring them back to ol’ Canadia. In Melbourne I hitched a room with Kirsty and Anthony who taught with me at ECC in Japan. They were staying in a quaint Melbourne suburb called Brighton, right next to the beach. Kirsty was the ultimate host and I had the luxury of spending at least a few afternoons sipping tea and getting caught up on my administrative burdens. I settled in and had a wonderful romance with Australia and its rugged coastlines, kinetic cities and warm (yet oddly sarcastic) locals.

In Melbourne I went for jogs by the beach, browsed trendy shops, checked out the (FREE) local art gallery’s indigenous art, sipped martinis and Lattes in trendy restaurants, browsed the unique shops and hung out with Kirsty and Anthony. 

Penguin Parade

I took one day-trip while in Melbourne to see the Penguin Parade. The tour price floored me as I had just come from Bangkok where 30 dollars for a two day tour was considered outrageous and here one day, no accommodation, was at minimum 100 dollars. But it was well worth it. We tasted some wine at a winery, fed Kangaroos, took pictures with Koalas and patted wombats (my new favorite pet…sooo cute!).

The penguin parade was wild. A bunch of pint size (like one foot) navy and white penguins who float up to the shore at night, wait for their friends while nervously looking around (their dash to their homes over the beach is when they are most vulnerable as prey), wait until they have a good little group together, and then dash across the sand in a parade-like waddling row. It is the cutest thing I have every seen in my life.

I have always felt a sort of affinity for penguins and felt connected to them somehow. You see, I have very limited memories of when I was a tyke, but I do pretty clearly remember my first and only audition for a McDonald’s commercial when I was something like 6 years old. I guess my mom thought I was cute and that I might have a future in selling the big arches (foreshadowing of my successful two-year first job stint at an Oakville Mickey D’s). Well anyway, there I was in this audition, kind of cluelessly staring gape-eyed at my surroundings and checking out the other little actors when I got floored by a question that the interviewer had now thrown my way. She asked me what my favorite pet was and I went completely blank-as-a-bimbo and from somewhere in the depth of my frozen operating system I pulled out the word penguin. I confirmed that penguins were my favorite pet. They weren't then, I was just nervous, but now they are!



Kirsty and I also checked out my first Aussie Rules football game and I am hooked. Hot Aussie blokes running around in short shorts and being all macho with each other. What warm blooded female wouldn’t be! But seriously, it was a fun game to watch and the full stadium of energetic fans was a real turn-on!

Girl's Weekend

After a few days in the city we headed up with a few other ladies needing a mini-break to Kirsty’s family’s holiday home. It was a beach town in the winter so it was serene and beautiful. Rugged coastlines, wild shrubbery and Fish and Chip shops as far as the eye could see. We settled in and drank some wine and made some wonderful food.

Next morning we visited a new hot spring that was the first to open in the state of Victoria. It was wonderful and I was very nostalgic for Japan at this point.

Sunshine in Sydney

I headed off early to catch a night train from Melbourne to Sydney. The train was refreshing compared to the coughing and spitting that I experienced on South East Asian trains, and my sleep was only interrupted sporadically by the guy in front of me announcing world cup standings (this was the night/morning Australia won their second game in the cup so everyone was pretty excited).

Arrived in Sydney and was picked up by Dan whom I’d met in China and his sister Ellen. We did a little morning tour of the streets of Sydney and enjoyed the early am soccer revelers who were still a bit in shock from their recent victory.

Then we headed off to visit some of Sydney’s popular beaches including Bondi. My friend’s fam was in town and it was also full on Aussie Rules weekend for the boys, so we started the weekend off with a footy banquet that night. I use the term banquet loosely as it consisted of a bunch of cute but gruff men oogling some retired footy players who talked for what felt like a century, as we all clawed our way through buns with no butter, massive just unfrozen shrimp that we had to shuck ourselves while delicately avoiding their still intact entrails and then platefuls of yummy but barbarically served chicken.

I felt for a moment that I was at Medeival Times banquet hall, only was much less entertained. The night was topped off with an auction for footy stuff. Yippee, it was a blast. TGFA…Thank God For Alcohol that night and we finished the evening off with a romp at a local dance club.

The rest of the weekend was filled with wonderful sightseeing around beautiful Sydney: the ferries, the beaches, the opera house, the shops, the wonderful restaurants, the famous bridge. I was there the same weekend that Nicole Kidman was getting married which added a little bit of energy to the whole place. Saturday night saw yet another Professional footy game with a much more rowdy bunch and Sunday watched my friend Dan play in his own football match. It was indeed quite an enjoyable weekend.

I also got to hook up with my roommate from Japan, Audrey, at one of the dance clubs, and also met up with a bloke I met in Croatia when traveling 5 years ago for dinner. The world is indeed miniscule on certain days.

Brisbane Relatives

Flew up on the Monday to stay with some long lost relatives in Brisbane and to catch up with some of the more famous Aussie scenery. Flew with Virgin airways and sat next to a woman who kept repeating "Take me Jesus"...what a trip! Stayed the first night in a hostel and due to my tiny complaints about a million ants in my room, was offered an entire suite all to myself – two floors and cable and all (which doesn’t mean much when ants are crawling around your bed). 

First day headed off on a small four wheel drive trip to Moreton Island where I had blast whale watching, driving over beaches, sandboarding and swimming in the brutal Aussie winter ocean around some sunken shipwrecks. I have a massive fear of sharks though so it was kind of a dive-and-dash type experience.

Stayed with my relatives for one night and had a fabulous Aussie BBQ. Then headed up North on a night bus to see Fraser Island, the largest sand deposit/island in the world with its own rainforest. It was wild and we waded through freshwater rivers, swam in a lake that was so acidic that no other animal (minus a few turtles) would survive in (that polished your metal jewelry and left your skin feeling fabulous), saw an old ocean liner cruise ship that was left to decay on the beach by the Japanese who had bought it and then were forced to let it go at sea. It was all really amazing and stunning.

Headed back to Sydney for the last weekend and spent some more time with Dan. Headed to the beautiful blue mountains on the Friday and admired its Grand Canyon-like views, toured the Sydney opera house, saw my favorite Opera, Lakme, at the Opera house, went out for some dancing and chilled out by the waterfront. It was relaxing and wonderful, but not a little sad as I was fixated on my imminent departure from Australia and all that meant. I.e. heading back home after 15 months away. The thought of the last 15 months being reduced to the 5 days I had left was a bit overwhelming and disorienting.

You Think You're Funny?

I will never feel totally at ease with Australian humor. I remember back in Japan having to take a few deep breaths and hold my tongue every time an Aussie friend talked because there was an edge and a sarcasm in it that we apologetic/politically correct Canadians can massacre in translation. I am already a relatively sensitive gal and comments like “you’re useless” and “well, that was a stupid comment” are a little bit harsh to my virgin ears. True maybe…but brutal nonetheless!

The Long and Winding (And Amazing) Trip Home

Headed off early on the Monday morning on my long flight back home. Stopped for three days in Hawaii where I met some great folks from New Zealand and Sri Lanka and ended up spending every night out until about 4A.M. and waking up at 8A.M. due to my hostel room situation. Went to a Luau, toured the North Beach, hung out with my friend Sheldon whom I met in Japan, drank frosty drinks on the beach, watched hula dancing on the beach, shopped and ate a lot. It flew by in the blink of an eye.

At the Luau we had to make our own flower bracelets and headdresses. If you were attached you would wear them on your left side, if you were single on your right and if you were attached and available you would wear them in the middle. I felt a little lopsided with all of mine on the right side, the invisible weight of singledom resting on my shoulders. I felt like I was wearing a big neon sign.

Hawaii was nice overall but, as I expected, not a place I will go out of my way to visit again (very pricey and touristy - lacking the culture of SEA).

Took another night flight to Vancouver (missed my first flight and luckily got on the 1am) and spent the next day in the city taking in the beautiful sights surrounded by mountains, ocean and a constant flow of seaplanes taking off and landing. Not 24 hours later and I was on a flight back home.

WOW…it was great seeing my family and I spent the first weekend with them.

Was it All a Dream?

Everything in me is resisting being back right now. Resisting getting back into a routine so similar to that which I left 15 months ago. I have changed so much and settling back into the same routine feels like I have gained a few pounds and I am desperately trying to drag skinny jeans over not so skinny hips. I’m giving myself (hesitantly) time to adjust and to settle before I focus too much on planning my next life steps.

Overall the last 15 months exceeded all of my expectations. I lived a dream that I had for such a long time and I leave with no regrets, only memories that make me laugh, smile, yearn and cry all at once and it is pretty amazing. When I grudgingly left for Switzerland oh so many years ago and tasted my first bite of living abroad, I remembered most vividly how separating yourself from all that is familiar to you really magnifies who you are. Without all of those day to day things that end up defining your life. It is one of the scariest and most exhilarating feelings in the world and I hope I get to experience it again in this lifetime. To all those I met, thank you for sharing in such an amazing moment in my life. Please keep me in the loop with your stories .

I’ll send you guys updates as soon as I have some exciting stuff to share. Maybe some fun Japanese stories that didn’t make the first cuts! Or some Trials and Tribulations in good ol' Toronto as I try to adjust. As you can imagine I have just as many mishaps and moronic moments on my home turf!!

Please continue to write me your news...

Until we meet again,

Carrie